What Hurts The Most
by VanitasRyuzaki
Summary: Sasuke, Mikoto and Fugaku had suddenly begun to shun Itachi. Why have they begun to disregard his existence and feelings? Will Itachi suffer in silence forever or will his family come to their sense and realize their mistake? First ItaSasu. Slightly brotherly love, but mainly yaoi related if you look closely and read carefully. Be nice. No rude comments.


**Vanitas: Alrighty. Here is my first attempt at ItaSasu/SasuIta. I truly liked how it resulted.**

**Sasuke: This is stupid.**

**Vanitas: Shut Up, Sasuke. You know you like it.**

**Sasuke: ... 'Crap...Can she read my mind?'**

**Vanitas: yes, i can. Now, Itachi, disclaimer please.**

**Itachi: Vanitas does not own I and my brother, or Naruto in general. Naruto belongs to Masashi Kishimoto.**

**Vanitas: True, but if i owned Naruto. It would have more yaoi x3 goodness.**

**Sasuke: Anyways. On with this story.**

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_Itachi Uchiha lay silently on his bed. His long raven hair pulled back in its usual low ponytail at the base of his skull. Dark circles forming under his eyes, and tears of sorrow streaming down his pale cheeks. He had grown thinner for the past few weeks, his body weakening from the lack of sleep and nutrition. However, he did not care in the slightest what happened to him, nor did his mother, Mikoto, and father, Fugaku, and now even his baby brother, Sasuke, did not bother to pay mind to him. It filled Itachi with great sadness, the one person he loved dearly and freely opened his heart to had abandoned him, along with the most of the members of the Uchiha Clan, who once praised him as a genius and "pride of the Uchiha Clan". The young heir of the Uchiha wiped away the tears from his eyes weakly, his hand shaking with effort at the action. "..." Itachi was lonely, and deeply yearned to be acknowledge, not as a genius and prodigy of his clan, but as a son and older brother. The sound of his parents bedroom door arose Itachi from his thoughts as did the door to his younger brother's room; Itachi quietly opened his door, scanning the hall before shutting said door softly, and made his way to the kitchen. _

_The once praised prodigy soundlessly heated leftovers from dinner he had made the night before. With a sigh, Itachi ate, in pure sadness, his dinner, rice balls. His mother no longer made his meals, nor did it bother her that he was not present at the table for any reason. Itachi sipped his tea, silent tears leaving his onyx eyes. He set his cup down, and buried his face in his arms, sobbing softly to himself. His heart aching with pain. "Sasuke...Mother...Father..." Crying out his anguish, Itachi was unaware of innocent onyx eyes gazing at him with sheer sympathy and sorrow. After an hour, Itachi had cried himself to sleep at the table as he has routinely done for the past eleven weeks. Light footsteps came into the kitchen, and stopped a small distance away from the slumbering, lonely adolescent. "Itachi..." Guilt-fully said a soft and innocent voice. Tiny hands placed a blanket over the suffering anbu captain with sad dark eyes. Two more pairs of onyx eyes came into view, drinking in the sleeping form of the eldest son of the Leader of the Uchiha Clan. "He's hurt emotionally, Fugaku." Stated Mikoto, a lone tear trailing down her beautiful youthful face. She now sees that she has been neglecting her first child, never once sparing a glance at the older boy with love and care. Fugaku, too, realizes his mistake in seeing Itachi as nothing more than a genius and heir to the Uchiha Clan. He trailed his hand through his eldest son's long raven hair, a forlorn smile gracing his lips as Itachi gave a relieved sigh. "Forgive me, Itachi." _

_Sasuke felt tears streaming down his face. How could he had been so cruel as to turn his back on the brother he loved dearly, the only person who acknowledge his existence, and giving him the attention he had desperately hungered for. His heart shattered into a million pieces when several tears escaped his brother's closed eyes. "Sasuke...come back...don't...don't abandon me..." More tears continued down Itachi's cheeks, his right hand clenching into a fist, and a whimper leaving his lips. Sasuke clutched at his heart, feeling it throb violently in his chest, his brother was calling out to him, begging him to return, only to be ignored and left behind by the child he deeply loved and care for. He watched mournfully as his brother sobbed softly in his sleep; Sasuke gazed at his mother and father with teary eyes, noticing that they too feel remorse in their hearts for neglecting their first born. Why had they suddenly turned away from Itachi? Acting as if he didn't even exist, allowing him to fade from their memory as he stood silently, watching his family slowly forget him. They had pushed him away so much that he would not even eat dinner until everyone had left the kitchen and retired to their rooms. "Aniki...I'm sorry...I'm so sorry."_

_Itachi awoke slowly, rubbing the sleep from his eyes before observing his surroundings, and realizing he had cried himself to sleep in the kitchen once again. He sighed and stretched his aching muscles, hearing the bones crack into places. His eyes widened when he caught sight of the blanket that had fallen from his shoulders, he shivered violently, feeling his eyes begin to water, but brushed off his emotions and threw the warm blanket away from him before grabbing several rice balls, and packing them into a brown paper bag. He grabbed the bag, and a container filled with tea, making his way back to his room to change into his anbu uniform. Itachi carefully eased his shirt off, hissing as the fabric brushed his arms, throwing the piece of clothing onto the bed carelessly and observing the several scars adorning his wrists and forearms. The young prodigy frowned, taking a kunai in hand and cutting viciously into his left arm, feeling his emotions becoming too great to control, Itachi decorated his scarred arm more and more until the pain in his heart at last eased. "These scars...each one made...because of the pain of neglection eating away my soul...No one knows...nor would anyone care..." Mumbled Itachi, crossing his room and entering his washroom to clean and bandage his new wounds. Not noticing that his younger brother had witnessed his actions, and soon broke down into sobs after seeing his beloved brother cutting himself to bleed his agony away._

_Many civilians of the Hidden Leaf were stunned. Each person feeling their hearts break at the sight. The anbu black ops wore pained expressions on their faces as did their co-captain, Kakashi Hatake. In the arms of the silver-haired anbu was their captain and prodigy of the Uchiha Clan, Itachi Uchiha. Several bruises and cuts aligned his youthful face, blood smeared across the metal of his Leaf headband and chest armor, more of the life-giving essence escaped from various wounds on the young adolescent's body. "Kakashi. What happened?" Questioned Kurenai Yuhi with anxious eyes. She had come to care for Itachi like a mother after hearing that his family, including the entire clan, had begun to neglect the innocent child's existence and feelings. Kurenai had taken the young thirteen year old under her wing, babying him as if he were her own child, and generously gifting him with the love he desperately yearned for. "Rogue ninja from Sunagakure." Said Kakashi, his eyes, one black and the other bearing the sharingan, reflecting pain and worry. His gaze soon fell on the unconscious adolescent in his arms, Itachi looked so vulnerable and fragile, his long raven hair escaping from its tie, and sweat coated his beautiful face. _

_Once Itachi was settled in the hospital, Kakashi proceeded to the Hokage's office to report the ambush during their mission to the Waterfall Village. "Lord Hokage." Calmly but anxiously voiced Kakashi. "I'm here to report that the mission was successful, but we were ambushed on our way back to Konoha. Our captain, Itachi Uchiha, had been gravely injured by the enemy, and needed to be placed under hospital surveillance." Hiruzen Sarutobi's eyes widened with great shock. How was it possible for a skilled anbu as Itachi to have been injured so severely by rouge ninja? The news jerked his heart as did word of the disregard the young Uchiha faced at the hands of his mother, father, and younger brother. "Kakashi. Report this to Shimura Danzo at once." _

_Sasuke watched with tear-filled eyes at his brother through the glass of the Emergency Room. His beloved aniki lay motionless under the white sheets, bandages adorning his head, neck, torso, hands, and arms, and perhaps more wrappings around his legs, which were hidden beneath the hospital bed linen. An oxygen mask covered his mouth and nose, lips slightly parted as his breath fogged the plastic oral nasal mask. "Aniki." Whimpered Sasuke, feeling great remorse eating away his heart, reminding him that he had been ignoring his older brother, casting him aside when he needed his gentle eyes and friendly face the most. Now, this was the price both he and his parents paid for trifling Itachi. "Itachi..." Sasuke silently slipped into the room after the doctor and nurses had treated his brother's wounds and checked his vital signs. His onyx eyes brewed with water, shakily taking his brother's bandaged left hand in his, kissing the wrappings around bruised knuckles with light lips. "Nii-san...Please wake up." Begged Sasuke, tears trailing down his baby face and staining the white sheets a dull gray. Never in his life has Sasuke felt so ashamed of himself, seeing the scars that marred his brother's arms the morning before, and now watching Itachi as he unconsciously slept made him feel more shame than ever. "Forgive me, Nii-san." Sasuke leaned closer to his brother's face, stroking a small bruise on his left cheek, and brushed his lips lightly over his brother's, savoring the sweet taste of his aniki. _

_Three weeks went by, and Itachi was allowed to leave the hospital after awakening two days following the ambush. Danzo permitted Itachi to return to his anbu duties, but was given light missions as a precaution to ease the young captain's strained body after being bedridden for weeks. Even though he disliked being babied by anyone, Itachi had smoothly accomplished each low level anbu assignment give to him by Danzo or the Third Hokage. Mikoto, Fugaku, and Sasuke attempted to bond with Itachi, which frightened the prodigy slightly, resulting in him rarely being home, and preferring to spend much of his time with Kakashi of the Sharingan. The Uchiha couple were wounded by their eldest son's actions, but understood that their he had become accustomed to being ignored by them and his younger brother that suddenly having them wanting to be around him after so much neglection, terrified the Uchiha prodigy senseless. "Fugaku. Maybe we should give Itachi time to adjust to sudden our consideration of him and his feelings." Proposed Mikoto, pouring tea into a cup and laying it in front of her husband, who sighed and returned to his thoughts. "So far...Itachi has slightly allowed Sasuke to come near him...However, he doesn't seemed to be comfortable with him showing him any form of affection just yet." Responded Fugaku, looking across the kitchen to his eldest son, whom appeared to be practicing his shurikenjutsu. He felt silent tears stream down his face, he had pushed away the son he had thought highly, and found himself regretting ever turning his son into an emotionless child rather than treating him tenderly and with love that every small child craved and deserved. _

_Itachi was aware of his father's stern gaze. He felt uneasy, but disregarded the manner, and continued to perfect his shurikenjutsu. Earlier that very morning, he had rose at the crack of dawn to train. Practicing his taijutsu, ninjutsu, and small amount of genjutsu. Itachi had not been very fond of the idea of his skills and body strength weakening after spending several weeks in the hospital. "Nii-san. You really shouldn't strain yourself." Advised Sasuke, hesitantly attempting to grasp his older brother's bandaged hand, only to Itachi flinch and pull his hand away. Sasuke sighed but smiled sadly, it was too sudden for him to try and hold his brother's hand after scorning him for so long. "I'm sorry, Aniki." Mumbled Sasuke, stepping away from his older sibling, yet soon finding his wrist held captive by a large hand. His onyx pools met those of Itachi. The smaller brother drank the hurt and longing in his aniki's eyes; Sasuke caressed his brother's cheek, wiping away the tears of loneliness escaping onyx hues. "I won't leave you, aniki. I promise." Sasuke assured, wrapping his small arms around Itachi's waist and burying his face in his stomach. "Thank you...Otouto."_

_Itachi continued to eat dinner alone at night, but was recently accompanied by his baby brother, who would sit behind him and brush his long raven hair affectionately. The eldest brother's eyes were closed and held a serene expression. Itachi moaned softly, enjoying the feeling of his brother smoothing the knots in his hair with the brush, and occasionally running his tiny fingers through several soft strands. "Aniki...I'm sorry for hurting you." Miserably spoke Sasuke, stopping his brushing and wrapping his arms tightly around his older sibling's neck. He felt Itachi tense under his touch, yet did not release his hold. The younger Uchiha desperately yearned to hug Itachi, wanting to prove to his brother that he loved him, but loved him more than a younger brother should. Sasuke knew this form of love was taboo, frowned upon by society; however, he did not care, all he wanted was for his brother to see that he was very precious to him, and would never allow him to fall into an endless sea of loneliness and neglection. "Sasuke..." The Uchiha heir's voice was broken, his words coming in small chokes as he tried to fight back the tears threatening to fall. "Don't hold it in, Nii-san. It's wrong to not cry when you need to." Lightly sobbed Sasuke, trembling against his aniki's back, tears trailing down his onyx eyes and soaking his brother's collar bone. With simple words, Itachi sobbed loudly, tears pouring down his face, his hands pressed into his eyes; Sasuke released his hold on his brother, pushing the dinner table away slightly and sitting himself in front of Itachi, taking his brother's hands from his face, and pulling the older Uchiha's head to his shoulder, who willingly allowed the action, stroking his back comfortingly and the other petting his brother's head. "It's okay, aniki. Let it out." _

_Fugaku gazed tenderly at Itachi as held him against his chest. How many years has it been since he held his eldest son in his arms? 'Too long.' Thought Fugaku, tucking a loose strand of raven hair behind Itachi's ear. The leader of the Uchiha wiped away a tear that trailed down Itachi's cheek, hushing his beloved son softly, cradling his small form lovingly. It had taken time, but Fugaku had at last managed to withstand Itachi's trashing; moments ago he had embraced his eldest son like a father should, which only resulted in Itachi becoming petrified with fear. It wounded Fugaku deeply to witness despair flash in his child's eyes. Itachi had struggled weakly in his father's arms, tears cascading from his onyx pools; however, what pained Fugaku the most was hearing his son begging him not to physically punish him for showing such weakness. "Please...don't...don't hurt me..." Those words continuously echoed in Fugaku's conscious; the anguish in Itachi's voice had stabbed Fugaku in his heart. Had he been so cruel as to cause his eldest heir to live in fear of him, to believe that every touch would soon harm him painfully? He now realized that he had pushed his eldest son too far, rather than loving him as the innocent child he had been, he chose to treat him as nothing more than to shape him into the perfect shinobi, taking away his childhood, all for the sake of the Uchiha becoming recognized and feared by shinobi within Hidden Leaf and across the Lands of Water, Wind, Waves, Earth, Lightning, Iron, and Whirlpools. "Forgive me, Itachi..."_

_Itachi awoke to warm arms surrounded his body, pressing it flush against a large form beside him. His eyes, half open, drinking in his surroundings , and soon falling upon a face greatly and deathly familiar to him. The eldest Uchiha tightened his eyes shut, awaiting the murderous hits and harsh words from his father, yet none came. With hesitation, Itachi drew his eyes to the face of his father, onyx pools soon widened with amazement. The eyes of the older man were filled with love, gazing tenderly upon his son. Strong arms tighten around Itachi in a loving embrace, shivers reduced to nothing, and gentle lips soon met Itachi's raven head, and words he had longed to hear his father speak soon followed. "I love you, Itachi. Never doubt that I don't. You are my son, and I should have treated you as such." Itachi trembled in shock. He had wished for the past few years that his father would see him as more than a shinobi bent on achieving greatness and restoring pride to the Uchiha Clan, and now, at long last, his prayers had been answered. The young weasel clung to Fugaku for dear life, hopping this moment was not an illusion created from his own imagination, or a dream he longed to come true, but no, the gentle and firm arms around him, the warmth enveloping him tenderly, and the words his father spoke from pure love had been real. Fugaku held Itachi, brushing his fingers through beautiful raven hair as the kind youth cried in sheer happiness; this was a moment Fugaku had long desired to see. His now soft eyes were drawn to the two figures standing in the path of the living room, genuine smiles decorating both Sasuke and Mikoto's face. Finally, the four of them were another step closer to becoming a family, a family that had been long forgotten since the day Itachi had become anbu captain. _

_Little by little, Itachi slowly allowed Mikoto, Fugaku, and Sasuke into his heart, and even became lightly comfortable with small gestures of affection from both his mother and father, and especially his younger brother. He had become aware of Sasuke's sudden bold demonstrations of affection, even the smallest gestures become more tender and heart pounding. Itachi could not comprehend why his heart was racing every waking moment his younger brother would gaze at him with those shinning, innocent onyx eyes, the innocence that radiated from his gentle smiles, the feel of his tiny arms around his waist, and child hand in his larger one, and merely having him within 5 feet of him sent his mind spiraling into an endless maze. Could he have become so accustomed to Sasuke's presence and affection that his love for his baby brother had become more than simple brotherly love? The heir of the Uchiha Clan tried his best to convince himself that this was not the case; however, the race of his heart when he thought of him, and the feeling of his pale cheeks reddening at the sight of his adorable face proved it otherwise. Itachi, anbu captain, genius and heir to the Uchiha Clan, had fallen in love with his innocent, loving and gentle baby brother, Sasuke Uchiha. "This love...is taboo...However, I cannot deny that his affections have affected me...Perhaps, his love had been the main thing that tore me apart when he disregard me several weeks ago...Believing that he would never accept this...made the pain all the more painful...But now, everything is beginning to change...change for the better, I pray." _

_Sasuke felt great joy. His nii-san was coming out of his shell, slowly but surely. He graciously adored Itachi, and now realizes that he had been wrong to have disregarded his brother's existence. The tiny Uchiha wondered still as to why he had suddenly begun to ignore his precious nii-san. However, now, the matter had been dealt with, and Sasuke was glad that Itachi had allowed him entrance into his heart once more. The other day, Sasuke and Itachi had gone to the market to purchase several items their mother had listed for them; Mikoto had decided to make the weasel's favorite meal today for dinner, rice balls and cabbage. Sasuke smiled at the memory of his mother sneaking away earlier this morning to purchase several sticks of dango for his aniki; the beautiful woman also knew Itachi had a sweet tooth, especially when it came to dango. "Sasuke. Why are you smiling like that?" The tiny Uchiha squeaked in surprise, and blushed nervously at his brother, telling him that he was smiling because he was with his aniki, giving the older male's hand a gentle squeeze. He noticed a light tint of pink on his brother's cheeks, and internally squealed with joy, perhaps his brother held more than brotherly affection between them as he did. _

_'Aniki. Maybe one day...you and I will be able to be together...as more than just brothers...' Thought Sasuke, continuing to day dream of a future that would allow both he and Itachi to show more than brotherly love between them. _

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**_Vanitas: Touching, neh? Alright. Fanfictionists. I have a mini quiz for you. _**

**_1. What is the main theme of this story?_**

**_2. Why do you think Mikoto, Fugaku, and Sasuke begun to disregard Itachi?_**

**_3. What is the real reason Itachi cut himself with a kunai?_**

**_4. Did this break your heart? Why?_**

**_Vanitas: Well. that's the mini quiz thank you for writing, peace fellow ItaSasu fans._**


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